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Why Holden May Need to Enter Witness Protection
I live in Hokie territory. In case any of you don't know what that means, just try burning a Virginia Tech flag in effigy in Virginia and see what happens. Needless to say, T and I are not huge VT fans. I went to Miami.* I'm required by some sort of green and orange bond to hate Virginia Tech and all things Hokie. I'm pretty sure they covered that in orientation.

A few years ago, T and I scored tickets to a VT-Miami football game in Blacksburg. To be fair, the people of Blacksburg were as nice as could be, even to the Miami fans. The game itself was a bit overwhelming, with turkey calls and keys rattling. I remember that football fever and frenzy from my days at Miami, but I've rarely been to games where I've been in the minority. It was, um... interesting. And yes, Miami sucked donkey balls and T and I were able to escape without being torn limb from limb or anything.

Flash forward to a few weeks ago. The kids got a new movie, Chicken Little. As with all new movies that enter the house, they must watch it obsessively until they have something new to distract them. Consequently, we've seen the movie 548 times in the last 2 weeks. And that's only a slight exaggeration.

Today Little H walked with his sitter to see a neighbor on the corner. They walked past a house with a giant Virginia Tech flag flying in front. (You can't swing a dead dog cat down here without hitting a Hokie fan. Um, sorry. That was a really bad Michael Vick joke.) The flag featured the Hokie turkey quite prominently. Hollis turned to M, started hopping up and down excitedly screaming and pointing, "Look, Miss M! Look! A chicken! A chicken!"

T and I think this is hilarious, but M is worried that her family will have to move if word gets out that Little H has been calling the Hokie Bird a chicken.

Those little ones are awfully intuitive, aren't they? Maybe the new VT fight song can be the Chicken Dance.**

* Yes, yes, I realize that Miami is stinking up the football field this year too. I know, I know. No need to rub it in.
** I didn't realize until I reread this post that it could actually seem like a reference, in very poor taste, to the tragedy at VT last year. I assure you that this is just good natured ribbing from the fan of a football rival. I only mean to disparage the VT football team and its former player, Michael Vick. Please take it in that spirit.

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Anonymous Emily said...

Yeah, and I thought it was bad my husband wants to raise our boys as Redskins fans -- in Philly. Your situation is much, much worse.

Blogger Sunshine said...

You and I have had the "opposing football team" crazy fan conversation and some people do go overboard, I do enjoy the people who can support their team but not be complete asses about it.

At least, with our "enemy" team status, we both suck donkey balls this year. It's been a challenging year to say the least!

Blogger jen said...

chickens are totally underrated. i mean, they give their lives, their eggs, their very breasts.

long live the chicken. turkeys give it up too, but really, it's the chickens that keep the world turning.

(oh never mind)

Blogger Julie Pippert said...

LOL! He needs a t-shirt with that printed on it. ;)

I am still amazed by Arkansas fans, who I gaze at in stunned admiration?horror? with my mouth doing a good carp imitation.

I mean...people who will wear pig noses on their faces---proudly and voluntarily---and make oinking sounds.

THAT'S school spirit.

Blogger Amy W said...

I am going to try and post a comment again...if it doesn't work, I will begin to think you are blocking out all Hokies Alumni from commenting...:)

I didn't know Miami had a football team this year. Huh.

Sorry, I had to put that in there...I really shouldn't say anything though since Tech has been known to choke.

Blogger Amy W said...

And I had no idea that not all football teams did the "key" play jiggle your keys thing. I lived in my own little world in Blacksburg...

Blogger Jenn said...

Gotta love a football girl, no matter her misguided ways. :)

Blogger QT said...

yes, he MAY need that program ~

Blogger Bon said...

as a puzzled Canadian, all i really took from this post was an image of poor little H being chased by giant chicken mascots.

it scared me.

Blogger slouching mom said...

oh man, your boys are in for it. heh.

Blogger Mrs. Chicken said...

My husband is like this about OSU. I don't get it, I really don't. Football is not a big deal where I grew up, and then my university actually DISBANDED the football team.

But either way, I hope your team wins on rivalry Saturday!

Blogger ExPatSW said...

After leaving uni I almost moved to Knoxville, Tennessee but then I found out that I couldn't live anywhere in the state and not embrace the colour orange (UT's colours are orange and white). As I detest that colour, I chose not to move there! (Well, the accent that I would definitely have picked up was a factor, too!)

[I can't believe they haven't worn out the turkey yet! It's been two years!]

Blogger Lawyer Mama said...

Yep, P. Cracker Barrell obviously sells some high quality crap!

Blogger ExPatSW said...

I was doing a home visit the other day and one of the children came running up, "P, look what my gran gave me!" Sure enough, it was the Chicken-Dancing-Turkey! I immediately said the the parent, "OMG! Is there a Cracker Barrel in London?" They looked at me like I was nuts!

Blogger CPA Mom said...

Hollis is one smart child.


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