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Who is Your Google Twin?
A couple of weeks ago my local paper did a story about Google twins. (Your Google twin, for the uninitiated, is a person you locate by Googling your own name.) Admit it, we've all egosurfed before. It's right up there with stalking old boyfriends and girlfriends on the list of high ranking Google entertainment. And it's a good way to kill time. If you have a somewhat unusual, but not too unusual name, you can find some interesting twinnage.

I have to cheat to find my Google twin. I have a hyphenated last name and my maiden name is fairly unusual outside of the State of Louisiana. I am reasonably well assured that no one else in this world shares my legal name. My first name and maiden name, however, yield far more interesting results. My Google twin lives in Hawaii, is ten years older than me, and belongs to several motorcycle clubs. I've been following her since 1996. The other Lawyer Mama is like my own digital doppelgaenger. By following her online progress, I can see what my life could be like ten years into the future if I chose a different path. I'm not raring to move to Hawaii, and motorcycles scare me, but it's a nice little fantasy. My Google twin helps facilitate the fantasy by revealing only bits and pieces of herself online. I, on the other hand, am a cyber-exhibitionist. If you Google my name you get all sorts of stuff that gives you a pretty clear picture of my life: career, kids, political leanings, and my blog. There are even pictures to spell it all out.

My husband, on the other hand, has this almost pathological need to keep his name off of the Internet. He also has a very unusual first name. Until very recently, the only Google hits for his name involved birth and death announcements. Whoopee. I am constantly disappointed by T's Google information. It's almost as if he doesn't completely exist without a complete cyber-profile. T is amused by my disappointment and actually takes great pride in giving any potential cyber-stalkers almost no discernible information about his life.

Last week, however, I hit pay dirt. While wasting away a few hours minutes on the Internet, I discovered that T now has a Google twin. In fact, he has TWO! And, man, are they good ones. One of the top hits for T's name was a runner up in a state level Miss USA pageant. Yep, she's a woman. That really chaps T's ass because one of his pet peeves is the recent trend of using boy names for girls. You can practically watch him turn purple if you happen to mention that your cousin's friend's second daughter is named Hollis. It's a sure way to turn his crank. So that one is gratifying, but the other Google hit is even better. The first hit for T's name is now a profile on IMDb. A fledgling director sharing T's name has burst onto the movie scene ... with soft porn. As I'm sure you can guess, T is thrilled! To make it even better, the Google T appears to have no photos online, so an old girlfriend or acquaintance will never be entirely sure that the director of, say, Forest Hump isn't my T. Baaaahaaaaa!

OK, yeah, I'm sure I could make this into a serious post. There's lots of material there: fantasizing about a freewheeling life in Hawaii, my husband's pathological need for privacy and my need to vomit my life details all over the Internet, but I'm just not going to go there today. Sorry. Maybe another time.



Blogger PT-LawMom said...

Love it! I have a major Google trail (another reason I'm still anonymous) and some of it is from as far back as 2000! What I need to know is how to bury some of the older stuff that I'd rather future employers not see. If only I'd known then what I know now... ;) I'll have to look up my husband and son to see if they have Google twins. I have stalked a lot of old high school classmates this way. Even found out one was sent to jail for embezzlement! Google searching is definitely a good way to put your own life into perspective.

Blogger DD said...

My twin (via my married name) is a real-estate agent. *yawn*

I don't have one via my maiden name, which is also very, very unusual. I only found myself.

Blogger jennster said...

my real name is too unoriginal.. i have more like google quintuplets or something!

Blogger ExPatSW said...

I received a telephone call one night from an former neighbour of mine (or so she claimed to be). Said she had recently moved back in the area (SE Louisiana) and had heard that I was living in H., too. I was feverishly trying to identify the voice since that is frequently my first recall about someone. Alas, nothing was coming to me! Meanwhile, this woman was asking me questions about my life over the past twelve years which was how long it had been since we were neighbours in S. When I sucked up the embarrassment and admitted that I could not rememeber her, she said, "OMG! How could you forget all of those horrid Saturdays at the soccer field [yes, they were horrid and I could recall them with perfect clarity and she wasn't there!] when my boys and your boys would...[Wait, I don't have boys!]" When I explained to my caller that I didn't have any sons, just the one daughter, she was speechless! Finally, the light bulb went off in my head! "Excuse me, do you by chance think that I am the PH who is Director of Nursing at NS Hospital?" Yes!

My Google-twin happened to live in the same town as me and I kept receiving telephone calls for her. I finally got up the nerve to visit her at the work place and she was thrilled to meet me! Seems that she had been mistaken for the new social worker in town as often as I had been mistaken for the Director of Nursing of the local hospital! To this day, I still receive the occasional email for her.

LM, going off to Google T.'s name and giggle!

Blogger Oh, The Joys said...

Mine is a college aged Lesbian who wins running competitions... hmmmmm.

Blogger Alpha DogMa said...

I have thousands of twins by using my married name (aka my Legal Alias). Our last name is very common and my first name was in vogue for millions of babyboomers. Most are in their 50s or 60s and very dull. Using my maiden name (aka my Legal Name) there are fewer but still at least a hundred. I am as common as dirt.

However, like your T, the Omega Man has only a few twins and they are all female. And yes, he too is sensitive. And I'm amused.

Blogger CPA_Mom said...

there is one person with my first name and maiden last name and she lives in Michigan. that's all I can find out about her. Interesting! Wish I could find my ex-husband but his name is too common.

Blogger Justice Jones said...

My married name is too common. My maidan name is way original. No one in the world but little ol' me and an aunt that I was named after and our names are identical, first and last. Thankfully, I've only done a few things to disgrace her, I mean me :)

Blogger Gunfighter said...

I have incredible Google twins... at least four professors, revloutionary war soldiers. A civil war soldier from Connecticut, a British General in the Am. Revolution, a Harlem Rennaisance painter, A print journalist, and some guy who lives about 5 miles from me.

Blogger Mad Hatter said...

My name is so common that I have a google gazzilion rather than a single twin. My husband, on the other hand, is unique. No twin whatsoever. I haven't searched my daughter yet but her mix of odd anglo-saxon name with rare German surname likely guantees her singular presence on this planet.

Blogger Mad Hatter said...

I just googled my daughter's name. 0 hits. She is the only one, baby!!

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